Muzik

Welcome To My World. Like my Joy Stick?

 I   hate to steal Dane's brilliant thunder, and this is definitely "off-topic," but . . . I was ruminating, as I am wont to do (also will to do) and hey, Lookout, World. Durknit Is Ruminating Agin.

And I ruminated about this:

I was over at my pal Dimitri's house yesterday (he's all of 30 years old!) and he regrettably had the radio tuned to some mindless station, which was presumably pumping out the "latest hits."

It had been the first time I was subjected to the assault on my ears of this kind since Giorgio Moroder and disco.

This stuff is INCREDIBLE! And I don't mean that in a good way.

What I find remarkable, other than the immensely boring 4/4 tempo, is the complete lack of chord structure. You thought Punk only had three chords? Try TWO. It's like they took a couple of chords, put them through a shredder and then fed them into a computer and then autotuned the fuck out of it.

"Mindless" gives it too much credit.

If this music had a color, it would be GREY. No, strike that: it would be the color of static on your TV set . . . when there was static, that is. Just random audio pixels assembled by a computer and then extruded, like bland pasta, into a shape: "Lady Gaga Love To Love Me Mixtape 25" . . . "Kanye West Shoot The Cop Mashup/Vangelis Chariots v. 87" . . .

Remember that music that George Lucas imagined would be playing sometime in the far future in the Star Wars bar scene -- you know, the alien horn section -- well, Georgie was WAAAAYYY too optimistic. As I recall, it was a blend between Artie Shaw and Dizzy Gillespie.

Today's hits are a blend between Coke Zero and A McDonut.